While eating, father took the chicken run from my plate and gave it to my brother-in-law and said,
- "How long will I go home and eat Imran? I studied so hard. I haven't got a job yet. Can't you die? Can't God take you away?"
Hearing this, my eyes watered. The rice did not go down my throat. Each grain of rice fell into my throat like a thorn. My brain froze. I had a deadly pain in my chest. How my brother-in-law laughed at that. He sarcastically said,
- "The office where I work needs a security guard. You said I can hire you there. It's not a small job, right?"
This time I could not remain silent. The inertia in the voice disappeared. I said in a loud voice,
"I don't want to work under others father. I want to create self employment. I need more time.
Abba angrily pushed away the food plate in front of my face with his hand. I then said - "The population of the country is increasing day by day, Abba. Compared to that, there are less employment institutions. The government cannot provide jobs for so many people. I see that many boys like me have finished their studies and are unemployed. There is a book. Is it my fault, father? I want to do something.
Hearing my banter, father came to the yard again. He slapped my cheek. He grabbed my shirt collar and said,
"Get out of my house right away. I am teaching you so much. At this age, boys work and eat, parents pay for their expenses. And I have to pay for your interview. You are a sin. Get out of the house."
My eyes filled with salty water. Men don't cry. Still I cried. Wiping my tears, I came out of the house. We are four brothers and sisters. I am the eldest. It has been a year since I finished my studies. Still can't find a job. It's difficult to get a job now unless you pay bribe and uncle's reputation. We lack in the family. We run out of money to bring salt to the house. Dulabhai never helps with money but always wants it. Dad looks at your face and says something. No. Sometimes we have to eat only one meal. My mother is sick for a long time. My father works to bring medicine for my mother. So after so much wandering I decided to do something myself. I will create my own self-employment and relieve the suffering of the unemployed. All hope has been broken by this daily torture. How helpless I feel. My head doesn't work anymore. I feel small when I look at my family.
I was thinking what to do with it. I was sitting on the high bench under the mango tree at the village junction and imagining the future. Then the flowers of the house next door came to me. The girl is very sweet. Long thick black hair. She is like a beauty. The girl loves me. I am also strange to her. I feel tension. But because of this unemployment, I always keep the girl far away. I love the girl in my heart. But seeing her at this moment made me angry. Flower came to me and sat on a high bench. She looked at me with her legs and said,
"Imran brother, is uncle scolding you?
I was annoyed. It was like a pinch of salt on a thorn. I said,
"What's your part in that? Stay in front, sir."
- "I love you brother Imran.
"I don't love you. Don't you understand?"
How sad this time flower. Looked around and looked at me with sad eyes and said,
-" Abba is fixing my marriage. Don't let us run away. I will not marry anyone except you.
In my poor condition, I got angry at the girl's behavior. Where will I run? What will I eat? Flower is the landlord's daughter. Will her life be ruined if she is with this poor man? Does the poor man have love again? I removed the inertia in my voice and said,
-"You married someone else. I can't marry you. You will not come in front of me. Otherwise, I will give you to the landlord's uncle."
That's why I didn't delay any longer. Am I going to ruin someone's life? Ful Shyamal is beautiful, but she is the landlord's daughter. Uncle will never accept us. There will be chaos in the village. My father and mother's honor will be lost. I left without saying a word. Looking back, perhaps I could see the girl's eyes.
Three days have passed in between. I have received two tuitions. If I continue like this, I will get some money in a few months. I thought I will open a poultry farm with that money. I have thought a lot about this.
I am returning home after staying at a friend's house for two days. I met Phul on the way. Phul is not alone today. He also has a son with him, his age is about thirty. The boy is quite handsome. Phul was embarrassed to see me. I went ahead and said,
- "Where are you going flower? Who is the man?"
How the eyes of the flower became wobbly. She turned around and wiped the tears. Then she said with a smile,
-- I got married with him yesterday brother Imran. Today I am going to my father.
After hearing about Phul, the sky broke in my head. Phul got married in two days? I loved her. I used to fantasize about the girl. That flower is in someone else's possession today? Chest pain started. It felt like the chest is bursting with pain. Phul is about the boy. The eyes were hidden. I stared at a sight. How paralyzed the hands and feet were. Tears pooled in the corners of the eyes. With tired eyes, I saw the face full of pain in the flower.
Unemployment ended my life. Unemployment is a curse in this life. One day I may get everything. I will be the breadwinner in the family. I will not get the flower lost in unemployment. I could have. I would have got the flower for myself. I would not have to listen to the abusive words of my father and the harsh words of my brother. Finally, I could live like myself. I sighed.
~ Finished!
In writing: Bristhi Sheikh